As a child you probably spent a great of time wondering what it would like to be an adult, and thinking about the things you would like to do when you finally got to be in charge of your life. Some of them may have been influenced by things you already liked to do, and others may have been influenced by books, family members, people who influenced you or things you saw. For those with a talent or passion that was encouraged and nurtured, those dreams may well have carried through to adulthood, and perhaps even converted into a career.

For others the dream may have been the driving force through childhood, inspiring you to learn the skills needed to bring the dream to life in adulthood. For some perhaps those dreams were not nurtured or were financially impossible, so they were tucked away. For others perhaps the reality of the dream wasn’t what had been expected, or physical limitations meant the dream couldn’t be realized as fully as had been hoped.

Does that mean that those dreams that haven’t been lived, or that didn’t quite make it to fulfillment are gone forever? Whatever your history, at midlife we all have a chance to review our dreams; the ones we got to live, the ones we followed with limited success and the ones we regret not following, and may wonder if they can be recaptured. Perhaps now is also the time and opportunity to fulfill your dreams?

My take on this is that this time round we have the advantage of being adults, so are not as dependent on others to help us fulfill our dreams. Granted we are not as physically able as we were in our youth, so playing in the world cup or becoming a prima ballerina may no longer be realistic, but it doesn’t mean we can’t learn the skills to perform at our best now. There are teams grouped by age for all kinds of sports, there are dance classes, voice lessons, flying lessons, art classes – and pretty much any other kind of learning opportunity you can think of available for a minutes of searching online.

So, what were your dreams as a child, how many of them have you fulfilled – and how many more are still waiting for you to pick them up again and make them happen?

How can you reclaim them?

While midlife is primarily a time for accepting that some dreams will never be fulfilled, it is also a time to create new dreams based on what you now know about yourself. It is important to grieve those that have been lost and acknowledge their passing. You may have invested many hours in working towards them, and now realizing that you will never be a brilliant concert pianist or an X games gold medalist, may be a significant realization.

In the place of the things that time or talent have overruled, you now have the opportunity to build new dreams, and this time you get to choose the ones you want! You may have tried to be a scientist for your parents, but now you accept that you are entirely right brained and can now be the sculptor you always wanted to be. If you decide to go back to school, don’t be surprised by the number of people your age you find there!

As you go through this transition, you may also find that the friends you had share fewer of your interests, so it can be a time to chose to widen your social network. With the internet is is so easy to find groups of people interested in almost everything.

If you live close to a major urban area you might try MeetUp and see what ongoing meetings are being offered in your area. You may be pleasantly surprised by how many groups specifically have ‘boomers’ or ‘midlife’ in their title!

Some cities also have over 40 groups at MeetIn and these events are generally one off, for a specific time and event, whereas MeetUp.com tends to have ongoing monthly meetings for different interests.